The Morning After...

"I'm going to give you a hug."

"This would mean so much more to me if you were sober, Simon."

"I am...oh. Ouch. I hit my head on the sofa."

* * *

So. Gemma's party. We dressed up. Actually, I was very impressed with the effort everyone put into their costumes. Ben came as a doctor, and Si a priest. Kirstin (the funniest drunk I have ever met) was a cowgirl, and Kat a glitterball (fairy). Sophie was catwoman, complete with a leather whip and domanatrix heels. I, apparently, was a "slutty" she-devil. Gemma, with her arse-skimming skirt, was just a slut. Richard and Kieran looked fantastic, as an undertaker and a kind of zombie thing respectively. The best dressed presentation was forgotten in the haze of sick and tears, but I would have given it to Richard purely for the fabulous top hat.

Unfortunately, the evening went thus:

"Oh, I'm so, so embarrassed. The first time you meet my new boyfriend, he throws up everywhere and has to be carried out, completely out of his head, in his underpants, by his parents and someone with a shrunken head on a stick."

Poor Gemma.

And so the party descended into a mass clean-up; the hostess was crying on the stairs whilst someone scrubbed the carpet and the priest sprayed body spray everywhere "because it still smells of sick!". It was a bit of a bizarre scene, as Vicky and I cleaned the bathroom floor in high heels.

Kirstin, though. Oh, I could write an entire book about Kirstin. I love the girl to death. She was just so funny last night, giggling, lamenting and periodically coming over to me and whispering "Robyn, did I go to the loo at your house? Did I write on Gemma's board?"

Better still, when we were in the garden and a few of the newbies were trying to chat us (and everyone else, come to think of it) up, one of them grabbed my arm and she replied with - and I quote -:

"Get off her, you naughty, naughty boy. That's naughty, isn't it Robyn? I'm not drunk."

And alcohol has an unfortunate way of getting you to talk far, far too much. Thus, we ended up discussing our miserable, desolate lovelives; the Alex debacle came up, as well as Kirstin's entanglements and Sophie's nympho tendencies. It was quite a messy affair, all things considered.

But it was bloody good fun.